pride!

What a day!! Flags flying from every rooftop, god save the Queen being sung on every street corner and the pubs open until midnight! Weve been steaming! I sent 70 St George cards didnt get one back, but I dont care, its for England. God bless her Majesty Winnie Churchill and all them bulldogs.

Ive never been so proud to be english.

shit Im pissed ...

london tarn

Mickey the Martian, me and Barely Functioning stand in front of Buckingham Palace - God save her!


The London Wheel. Cheryl took the kids on it and they filled it to a depth of about two foot with vomit and sick.


Fucking spoilt diabetics. You can get anythink in London, even special chocolate for the fuckers.


I have a snack in a London caff - look at that bleeding ant on me shoulder, the size of a small child.

We went up to London last week to see Mickey the Martian and Barely Functioning - Dad and mum to you lot. Had a punnet of eels and chips up by the river and yelled abuse at that Ken Livingston bloke as he rode past on his bike. We caused havoc!

thats my boy

Ive had some of the lads round this evening. Bobby found Little Marshes comic and was rolling around laughing. He can draw quite good - gets it from me even though Ive never tried drawing, never had the time.

birthday coming up

It's Ronnie and Reggies 18th soon (June 18th). Cheryl reckons theyll like these outfits but I want to get them a car each. Ginger knows a bloke that knocks out licenses, MOT's and tax disc's on a laser printer, and can do matching number plates as well. I fancy RON 1 and REG 1. Perhaps I'll get em a pony each too.

our day is coming

Its great to see that we'll be celebrating good old St Georges day next week. These are just part of the small range of cards in my local Spar, before I bought them all. Theres good old winnie, bulldogs, the flag, minis, mrs Maggie, even the odd swastika.

I'm going to buy a couple of sheets of English stamps and send them to everybody I know - Ginger, Bobby the Bone, Alby the lot. I bet I dont get any back. And I'm taking Little marsh to the facepainters to get his two and eight face painted red white and blue. I cant wait.

crime and punishment

Sitting quietly on the yellow bench near a child. Reflecting.


Taking their ballpond out - in public - so it can be sent to some dear little African children.


Leading the Macarena - in public.

What happened was the girls went out, got drunk on alcopops, munched on some ketamine and did indeed end up in a skip - asleep, rather than murdered.

It took me and Ginger six hours to find the fuckers, poking around in every skip and ditch between here and the Royal oak whilst Cheryl rung every private hospital in the area to see if theyd been run over or murdered.

Girls arent worth the bother, your much better off with boys. Little Marsh is rarely any trouble. Ronnie and Reggie are bastards. There not allowed to wear catsuits for a month, no Liberty X shows, ball ponds off to Africans, theyve both been on the yellow bench, they had to do the Macarena in front of dozens of kids and theyre not allowed any sweets for three months.

bloody kids!

The girls turned up (photos of their punishments tomorrow), now Ive found Little Marsh has been drawing cartoons. I love him but he hasn't got a clue how to draw and hes not at all funny. What do you think?

lost

Ronnie and Reggie went out this afternoon and haven't come back yet. Cheryl's worried, think they might be in a skip somewhere. That reminded her of the (original) kitchen and she gets livid with me, tips me fishie fingers in the bin and sends me out looking for them.

I made some posters with this picture from their 17th birthday saying underneath

LOST

TWO GIRLS (TWINS)

ANSWER TO THE NAME OF RONNIE AND REGGIE

CAREFUL THEY BITE

USUALLY WEAR MATCHING LEPPARDSKIN CATSUITS

REWARD FOR RETURN £100

I've put them up all over town on lampposts and in Morrisons

What with this and that new money I've had a bad day.

put 'em back!

So these are the new coins?

I WON'T BE USING THEM!

I still don't know why they got rid of shillings and joeys.

No doubt these will have Tony brown's head on the back side rather than the Queen of England.

My advice - if you get these in your change demand REAL money with the queens head on and throw them down the drain.